As I sit here waiting for my daughter's return from a play date, I am struck by the knowledge that I am alone. There is no one on the sofa, in the bath, in the other room, or out on the balcony. It's just me. Alone. The silence of the apartment fills my head.
The desire to fill the void is overwhelming. So, I start thinking. For those that know me, those words are as ominous as storm clouds. I am alone, but more serious than that is the fact that I am lonely. There is a huge difference between the two. Being alone ends at some point or another. My daughter will come home, a friend will stop by, I will go to work. People abound in my life, but still, I am lonely. Loneliness is an insidious creature that eats away at confidence, vitality, comfort, and soul. It makes you question things in your life that should NEVER be questioned, like who you are, what value you have, or the importance of you just being. I wish for so many things, but the thing I wish for most, is the comfort of my own "self". I have beaten this beast before, and I will do it again.
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